AJRMAN
God damn I'm fat
Today I had lunch with my girlfriend, not girlfriend, but girl/friend. I don't think I need to explain that, since I stated earlier that I was gay. She's the only one who makes me laugh. Hard. That ugly face sort of laughter. We had El Torito in Valencia. She was recently married, and now lives there. Her name is Teresa, and she's the prettiest and funniest girl I have ever met. We met three years ago, we both worked at the same restaurant. She as the waitress, and me as the Manager.
Later we joined a gym together, and worked out. We made fun of all the people at the gym. The blond bimbo, who wore makeup and suited up in a pink leotard. The girl who wore platform boots on the stair master, and the really gay aerobics instructor whose workout pants left little to the imagination. Let's not forget the muscle guys. The ones who would...well, I really didn't have any qualms about them.
To be a little perverted. The best part of going to the gym, was entering the locker room. Trying so hard to look like you're not looking. But as always with my luck, there would be saggy old guys there. Nothing worse than seeing old man penis. The really sad part was that I couldn't STOP looking. Those images are forever burned into my memory.
I haven't seen Teresa in two years. We had a little tiff, as all gay boy/straight girl relationships do. She ended up quitting. Two months ago she entered the new restaurant that I work at, not knowing I worked there. She wanted a place to have her wedding rehearsal dinner. Do you think it was fate? Out of all the restaurants, she chose this one. We have been e-mailing each other ever since.
Today was our first actual "date". We laughed through out lunch, that crazy laugh that I mentioned above. And I felt my stomach jiggle. When the hell did my stomach start jiggling? Worse than that, I also felt my man-titties do a little jig too. Right after I laughed, she asked me if I still worked out. Needless to say, we weren't even remotely on the subject of working out prior to my unfortunate fat dance. I quickly became quiet, and asked her why she would ask me that. She of course started laughing, and wouldn't tell me why. I knew why. How fucking embarrassing.
That's it, I'm going back to the gym! Please note, I'm writing this after I just gorged myself on Jack In The Box. Bacon Bacon Cheeseburger, Chicken Fingers, two fudge cakes, large Coke, and just to make sure the guy taking my order didn't think It was all for me, I ordered two milks. I am truly a fatty boomba latty.